Have you ever felt challenged to say "Yes" to the unknown, wiggle, squirm and agonize to finally choose YES and then have all the circumstances turn back around to "not right now?" If you understand what I am describing, then you are well aware of the emotional rollercoaster ride that can be.
I have often found at such times those are the exact situations that God uses to test our faith. Are we really surrendering all to Him and trusting Him to lead us every step of the way? Are we completely believing in the fact that even though our eyes can't see and our minds can not figure the future out, that we are trusting the All-Sufficient One who DOES know every intricate detail? Easier said than done more times than not.
Life is full of choices, forks along the road and decisions that seem hard pressed on every side. Where is our faith? Where is our trust? Even in those moments of finally going all in, to then being circle jerked back (such a southern term) to square one again. It can be such a frustrating place at times.
In my walk and relationship with the Lord, I find more and more that situations prompting greater trust not only challenge me in my faith but often are merely put along the journey to encourage me to lean in more to all that He is. In other words, that specific scenario may be the very essence of Him just wanting me to draw closer, to seek Him more intentionally, to make it a top priority to chill in His Presence; and maybe it is the exact pursuit and hunger for Him in those times that He longs for the most. I believe the most significant decision in those moments is "Will I be intentional to take the time to just "be" with Him and hear His heartbeat, regardless of any answer He may give me in that time.
Several scriptures of Truth come to mind:
“Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.”
“Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.”
“You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”
You may be at a specific place right now, faced with a decision that could be life-altering or possibly just a decision that could change the course of today. My prayer for you is that God will give you the spiritual ears to hear Him calling you above the noise to a place of sweet surrender to be with Him and enjoy His Presence. In essence, it is not about how long we spend with Him; it is the quality of those moments that are crucial. Fullness of life is found in Him; where there is no agenda other than spending time in His Presence. He renews our strength and reminds us that He is for us and that "all things work together for good to those that love Him and are called according to His purpose." (Rom 8:28)
Jamie